Congratulations, Yamapi <3
Just realised I don't have even ONE Yama-pi icon. What a disgrace! I'm gonna go out and look for some as soon as I've finished writing this post. Now I've found a really reallyy cute one <333 I do really think that Yamapi is pure perfection. He's the prettiest boy I've ever laid my eyes on. *melts* He combines prettiness, cuteness and beautifulness in such a complete and fully perfect way. I hope he's had a great birthday!

I don't think I realised earlier how wonderful my friends are. But when my boyfriend broke up with me, they were all there for me, supporting me. Mainly thanks to them, I've started thinking in other ways and started doing a lot of stuff other than crying. Really, my life has turned into an upward curve of happiness, if it wasn't for the fact that I feel so lonely sometimes. I just wish I had someone to hug, kiss and snuggle next to... I don't need a relationship (although I would not particularly mind it either), just someone to be close to. But I feel very appreciated by my friends, and that really makes me happy. Sankyu~ ^^

Hm... so I'm thinking about what to watch next, in the exciting world of jdrama. I think I'll go for Dragon Zakura and Ikebukuro West Gate Park. Yama-pi and Koike Teppei are both in the first one and that makes me squeel like a little girl. Which is what I am, but well... And Yama-pi is in IWGP too. So I just have to watch them! And oooh, I'm soooo looking forward to Gokusen season 3. As you've probably realised due to my LJ name, I love the series! Fighto - oh!!

Life didn't turn out as it was supposed to.

My boyfriend since two years broke up with me, and having been planning my entire future with him in mind I don't know where to go from here. He was both my love and my best friend, and it is a very hard separation on me. This spring I will have to choose what university I want to attend in autumn, but I really have no energy left to decide what to do. It feels like everything's just fallen apart. It's frustrating how everything reminds me of him. How all my lust for life just disappeared. I was a very happy person, I loved to live - now I have a constant aching in my chest that won't go away, and tears ready to fall behind my eyes.

I just don't know where to go.


Oh, how depressing this post is... Must cheer up a little. I do this via friends and jdrama and green tea. I just finished watching Neverland, with young kawaii Ikuta Toma, and currently watching today's Ikuta Toma in Honey & Clover. My "to watch-list" is immense, and I just don't know where to begin. However, some are more interesting than others. For example, everything with Yamashita Tomohisa must be seen! <3

Woah. I completely forgot to update this journal. I've been to busy drooling over pictures of hawt japanese boys, I guess.

I got my best friend into jdrama, so now we can drool together. She's into Oguri Shun (especially as Rui) and Koike Teppei. Koike is wonderfully cute. He looks so ultimately young!

My life is pretty good at the moment. I've had some problems with my boyfriend, and I guess they are still there but I can't help but just ignore them and be really happy. Because everything is going so fine. I turned 19 just the other week, and birthdays are nice. I had a great time with my boyfriend, my best friend and her boyfriend out at a restaurant and at the cinema. I've also gotten a freelancer project job, where I'm to layout a report and get payed pretty well (it's my first job so I didn't expect much at all). I hope this will also develop me as a person. And lastly, I've been chosen by people in my school to layout the school paper. So, it's about 50-60 pages in dire need of layouting... quite a big job! But it's an ego boost, too, I guess. Being chosen amongst all the people at school, and all.

And, to top it off, I have another interesting project going with two of my friends. We're making a movie (supposed to be around 20 minutes), and it's really funny, stimulating and interesting. And the equipment we use is really professional! Oh, and aside that - I discover new wonderful jdrama, jmusic and jmovies constantly. It's a wonderful life.

Well, that's a brief update that, sadly, no one will ever read.

Long time, no see. Not that anyone but my boyfriend reads this... I'm a little shy over the Internets.

At times I get obsessed by things. Well, I always have at least one obsession going on. Something to be fangirlwhory about, something to spazz about. It's a wonderful feeling and I hope that no one ever forces me to grow up and give it up. Through out the years, I've had many obsessions - most fits under the category 'music' somehow, or other cultural things such as books and movies and tv-series. Sometimes there's been certain styles, countries, characters, things... you name it. Right now, and has been for the past months, it is Jdrama. When my boyfriend went to Japan a couple of months ago, I started digging into the japanese culture scene. I've never been fond of manga or anime, so Japanese movies sprung to mind. At first I watched only horror, and I started enjoying the Japanese movie industry's work more and more. When I shifted from horror flicks to drama and the likes, that's when I encountered something life-changing.

I saw All About Lily Chou-Chou, and it was absolutely breath-taking. It became my number one favourite movie of all times. During the movie, I fell in love with Shugo Oshinari, one of the main actors. His character was extremely interesting, and Shugo played the part very, very well. I decided I wanted to see more of this very beautiful boy. That's when I came across Blue Spring - Shugo has a role in this drama. It turned out to be an absolutely brilliant movie - beautifully tense and fascinating all over. It is one of the absolute best movies I have ever watched. The search for more Shugo loving drove me into the trench of the Hana Yori Dango world (where Shugo has a minor role) - and thus I became obsessed with jdrama. Hana Yori Dango is still my favourite jdrama, with lots of good actors, an excellent storyline, emotions and heart-wrenching episodes. I soon fell for Jun Matsumoto, both his cool/nervous/stubborn performance as Domyouji Tsukasa, as well as his good looks and overall skills and talent. (On a side track - I'm a Junbait).

Since then I have watched kind of a lot jdrama (for being such a newbie), my favourites being the already mentioned Hanadan, and also LIFE, Kimi Wa Petto, Bambino!, Yamada Taro Monogatari, Galileo, Akihabara@DEEP (cracklol) and Gokusen. But just recently I found out about Hanazakari no Kimi Tachi e, and started watching it. Few series ever has brought me such joy! And then I of course had to fall in love again... this time with Ikuta Toma who I had already seen in Akiba@DEEP and also in Hanadan without knowing it. But in Hanakimi, he really stood out as the cutest boy ever. He's got the perfect personality, just the kind of friend or lover I would want. And I think all the storylines involving Nakatsu is so cute~! So this is my second favourite series...or equal.

The reason for writing all this? Who needs reasons when there's pants?!

So, it's my second day using my new LiveJournal account, and now I've found a layout that I really adore. Now it's time to get a snazzy and fitting mood theme and some pretty icons to accompany it.

I can for two weeks dedicate my days to whatever I want, as it is Christmas holiday. So far I've had a cold and my bed has been my closest friend, but now I'm pretty much recovered, and my lust to go outside is back. This year's winter is uninspirational, though. All the snow has already melted away - it already looks like in April. However, I want to do something. I just don't really know what yet. Tomorrow I'm going to solve this little 'problem' by visiting my boyfriend. I wanted to celebrate Christmas with him, but he was not up to the challenge of being harrassed by my relatives. There are still many Christmases to come, though. I will trick him into it next year.

I really am too tired to write anything important... I have lots of ideas of what to write down, but my weariness is stopping me. Instead, I will just try to make Last.fm work with my foobar again, and then I'll watch episode 9 of Yamada Tarou Monogatari and spazz some more over Shûgo Oshinari. Goodnight, everyone.

Well, LiveJournal is not entirely the same as it was when I left it almost two years ago. I have re-visited LJ a few times, to 'see' a few old friends and stalk some communities - but my visits have been brief. LJ has changed a lot, that's one thing I can say for sure. Have I changed? Will any of my old LJ-friends ever read this? And if so, can they tell the difference between the old and new me? If there even is a new me...

I have some reasons to go back to LiveJournal, although it feels a little awkward having been away for such a long time. One reason is, I miss the friendly fangirl atmosphere in the communities I were a part of. Another, of course, is because I miss having my Internet friends surrounding me when sitting by the computer. The other reasons are less crystal clear, though. I guess it's like having a diary, you just need a place to vent things in. I get the need to write things down.

Originally, I would have liked this journal to become some kind of platform for me and my boyfriend to share our views on private matters with each other. We love each other deeply, I can say that for sure, but we fight a lot and have different opinions and foundations in life. Because of that, this journal could have been our two-minded story of the same saga. However, my boyfriend declined, but maybe he changes his mind some day. Up until then, this journal is my own.